small and medium thoughts

Corporatespeak pet peeves

Reading Jeremy Wagstaff’s blog about his most hated ‘buzzwords’, I thought I’d share my own list of cringe-inducing corporatespeak for your reading pressure.

• Ecosystem
  I’m always told about how we should create an ecosystem for our products, supposedly so they can thrive in a so-called ‘autopilot’ mode. Well, the only ecosystem I know is dying and we’re all going to die in floods and mudslides.
  
• Offline
  As in “let’s take this offline”, meaning let’s deal with this after the meeting. Since when have we ever gone online in meetings? Does going offline mean we’ll ever take action on it or is it going to be conveniently forgotten in the graveyard of corporate to-do’s?
  
• Pencil in
  As in please ‘pencil in these dates in your diary’. How many of us still use pencils in the office – I mean seriously. I suppose this is for those of us who can’t stand commitments and will cancel at any given opportunity.

posted by hew @ 11:21 pm